How to Be Confident


If you are here hoping that I have a secret recipe on how to be confident, then you are going to be disappointed. Reality is, confidence doesn't just happen overnight. It takes a bit of work. Confidence takes years and years to build but seconds to break. Trust me, I know.

I am a quiet person, that's just my personality and who I am. However, I was someone that lacked confidence most of my teenage years. Growing up and in my high school years, I was painfully shy. Totally socially awkward (still am at times). It was quite hard to get a word out of me. Some teachers loved me for that- the quiet achiever. The only explanation I have for my shyness is that I just had really low self-esteem nor was I sure of who I was. 

Although anyone can look confident, not everybody can feel confident. First and foremost, you need to know yourself. Be honest of who you are. How could you ever believe in yourself if you are trying to be someone else? Surround yourself with people that encourages you and lift you up. 

 Never compare your weakness to someone else’s strength. It will only make you feel bad about yourself. You my friend, need to be content with yourself and be happy of others. Recognise your better attributes will distract you from perceived flaws and boost your self-esteem. Don’t let one negative comment get to you over all the compliments you have received. 

We really need to stop worrying what others think about us. Why does it matter? You don’t need other people’s approval to live your life. Accept that not everybody is going to like you. Those people don’t mean anything to you. If they do, they will like you for the way you are. I used to get caught up with what people taught of me. Now? I just don't give a fudge and tell you what.. it feels so darn good to just be myself!



The way I got over my shyness, was to really forced myself to talk to people. At work, I have to deal with a lot of people. Sometimes, even rude and negative people. I slowly learned to speak up and stand up for myself. Now, I can hold a conversation for more than five minutes. Hey, it's an achievement for me.

Take a leap of faith and do the things that you have always been afraid to do. I promise you that once you have overcome that obstacle, your confidence will grow. Everyone experience setbacks, but not everyone gets back up. It’s the getting back up that builds confidence.

You can wear make up, have designer clothes to feel confident but it will only be temporary. It’s about who you are as a person. Be genuine, be nice to others and you will feel better about yourself. I challenge you to give a compliment to a stranger today and see how it make them and yourself feel. Even smiling to strangers helps!

Through lots of practice and hard work, I can honestly say I am now an independent and confident person. I'm not afraid to go up to a stranger. I'm no longer afraid to ask questions. Speaking in front of a room full of people doesn't bother me much anymore. I can go out in public without wearing make-up. I don't care to make a fool of myself. If I can overcome my shyness and be confident, so can you! Just believe in yourself.

What makes you feel confident?

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Thanks a bunch for taking the time to comment on my posts. I appreciate all the positive comments! Smile always. x NY